soul_logs | [Close] Been away for far too long.

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[Close] Been away for far too long.

Characters: Sephiroth, Kuroro Lucifer
Location: Bitch's Brew Bar
Rating: Villains
Time: August 17, Noon
Description: After Sephiroth's entry. Because Kuroro multitasks things like ulterior motives and comforting allies.

Sephiroth was, for a man who presented to himself to the world as a cold and heartless bastard, curiously emotionally vulnerable. The facade wasn't a farce -- the man took himself seriously, no matter how ridiculous it seemed to people like Kuroro, who was a contending force of power in his own world. But if it wasn't a farce, then it was perhaps a defense mechanism? No, he doubted that, either. It might simply just be how the other man was raised, much like Nataku who didn't know a rock from a friend.

It wasn't a hard puzzle to solve; Kuroro had all of the pieces and it was easy to put things together and see the entire picture in his mind's eye. Murky, confusing, and grim. What interested him now was how Sephiroth was going to repaint it himself, and maybe contributing here and there to earn himself an ally. Not that he didn't have any sort of sympathy for Sephiroth -- Kuroro considered him enough of his to sincerely want to help, but the reason why he was actually doing so was something else entirely. Ulterior motives piled upon ulterior motives, like weaving a web (how pathetically poetic).

Sephiroth could be considered one of his, like a member of his new, temporary group, but Sephiroth also needed to be fixed first. Kuroro wasn't used to it, the Geneiryodan members as something he never had to worry too much about. Sure he sometimes had deep moments of concern when Coltopi got involved in big fights, and yes he shed plenty of tears for his dead people, but in the end, the group always moved on with only the slightest shrug of the shoulder. To have to fuss over a limb was somewhat of an alien thing to him, but something he found himself doing too often in Death City, with his pool of resources down to this insane man or the next. It was a good thing Shalnark and Machi were there. Two of his most reliable at his beck and call, and it would never occur to him to question their loyalty or stability.

So there Kuroro was, waiting in the Bitch's Brew Bar, already having had two drinks and a third waiting for him. Alcohol hardly did anything to him, with or without nen. Not when he can keep his motor functions through poison that can paralyze whales. Maybe if he drank enough, he'd actually feel a little tipsy.

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... Wasn't that a little extreme... Kuroro supported the general survival of mankind, after all, on a professional basis that without people to prey upon, the Geneiryodan would also have nothing to do and so would Kuroro's downward spiral to insanity undoubtedly begin. His pleasure was highly dependent on the existence of others, in indeterminate ways.

He considered his words carefully, because he was a hypocrite and aware of it. He had burned down an entire villag and massacred a clan for shallower reasons. Still, not the planet. More curiosity, no judgement: "Was there no other way to get revenge?" He guessed that the planet was also something to claim vengeance on. This Gaea that people from their world talked about seemed to work on a different realm of physics than theirs.

Sephiroth didn't bother hiding the chuckle at the following question. His past was one from a thousand years prior to even his birth, and far more in-depth than a simple case of being slighted.

"They kept me from my heritage, and the destiny Mother had started over a thousand years ago," He murmured. It was always so easy to fall back into normal routines. He knew well what Jenova was, and now what he was, but it was far easier than anything else to refer to her in such a way. "I was continuing her work."

That was why he had summoned Meteor to crash down on the planet so that he could absorb the energy from the Lifestream and elevate himself to the level of a God. After that, however, his anger and hatred had driven him to split part of his very soul in three so that he could escape the vile clutches of the Planet.

"Project-S. That was what I was known as before my birth," Sephiroth muttered while pulling his gaze away from the shotglass.

"Do you know what it feels like to be so overwhelmed with information that your mind cannot process the information properly? That your mind ultimately does what it can to survive to the point where you lose yourself and become something entirely different," Sephiroth asked instead before saying, "When I had once believed I had been human, I discovered that I was nothing but an experiment, a monster created through science to appease the egos of those who had created me so that they could being in possession of the greatest weapon known to humanity. A weapon that even the planet herself would stop at nothing to strip bare and destroy."

Hmm. How complicated. He looked properly curious, and then surprised, and mildly perturbed at parts of the story, but his mind was already hard at work. Take a shot, Kuroro. Stall for time as he sifted through the information, came up with ten different theories and possible ways to salvage this, figure out where to agree and disagree. It didn't occur to him to reach any point of disbelief -- Sephiroth wouldn't lie about something like this, proud man as he was.

"Then," Kuroro started slowly, thoughtfully, "Do you like your heritage?"

Kuroro's question actually managed to catch Sephiroth by surprise - enough so that the anger beginning to fester within disappeared in that same moment. He had never considered it in such a context before, and that much showed on his expression for the briefest of moments.

"I am what I am, and I accepted and embraced it long ago." Sephiroth eventually admitted before glancing down to his hand. He had a body now, but the ex-General knew well that he was anything but human. "That is why I sought to leave Gaea."

"Then if you've accepted what you are, embraced it long ago, generally seem fine with the fact that you are your mother's son, and that you've destroyed the people who have created you--" There was no simpler way to go about asking this. Maybe politeness would help. "Then why does it still affect you? Isn't it true that being able to accept it -- embrace it, even -- is a sign that you have already transcended what they've done to you, that you've triumphed over it?" Again, only plain inquiry, with no room for judgment. Kuroro wasn't interested in justifying the actions of someone else, when he was about as amoral as a person could go.

He had accepted what he was, but Sephiroth had gone to all length to hide it as well. Being here without his powers had been far too much of a toll on his mind, and it was reminding him well of what he used to be.

"And yet here I am being not only a weapon for another, but a science experiment once again," Sephiroth's words trailed off for a moment before he shook his head, "Perhaps it is merely my fate."

Everything always seemed to be out of his control no matter how much he attempted otherwise.

Ah, here, Kuroro could at least right him, in his small ways. "You seem to be under the impression that weapons are inferior to meisters here in this world, and you seem to have assumed that the BREW is in any way scientific."

He nudged the shot glass forward, still filled with Sephiroth's vodka, before propping his chin on his hand. "Let me guess: Your idea of power is freedom."

"The concept of a weapon is what I hold difficulties in accepting," BREW wasn't what he'd had been speaking about, but Sephiroth dropped the topic entirely. There was little point in bringing up Crane and just how much that attack had shaken him. If only he hadn't been so weak to let his guard down - that was what happened when he underestimated his opponents.

Turning his attention down to the shot glass, Sephiroth regarded it quietly before reaching out and slowly bringing it back into his possession. "I wished to be free of the planet that loathes my very existence, yes," Sephiroth muttered honestly before pausing long enough to down the shot, "But even with having the power of a God I was unable to obtain what I desired."

What did he even consider as power any longer? All that came to mind were the skills that he had lost since arriving here. He had wanted all of his life to be the same as everyone else, and now that he had something close to it, Sephiroth desired the return of his true strength.

There were so many things he could pick on from that. Pointedly, even as he was refilling Sephiroth's glass (they needed another bottle), he said, "Aren't you here and away from your planet now? If that's your desire, then it shouldn't matter if you obtained it via your powers or because another world decided it wants you in it."

Pessimistic. That was what Sephiroth was. For all his bravado and gravitas, Sephiroth was just like any other man with all their issues and complications. Sephiroth's was just bigger and more tangled than most, but he was still just a man regardless. "And weapons here aren't weak just because they turn into objects. Between a weapon and a meister, I'd say the weapon would have more chances of surviving battle here. The fact that the Deathscythes are celebrated here when the meisters are not should already be an indication of that."

"This planet was not my decision," What Kuroro spoke of was similar to what Cloud had said not long after they'd formed their partnership. The fact that a world might actually desire his presence left an unsettling feeling within his body, and Sephiroth wasn't quite certain what to make of it all. Besides, if he were to go to another planet, he would have preferred to have the decision to which one.

So, Kuroro wished that he simply accepted his fate as a weapon? The glory wasn't anything he desired, and whether they were weak or not was of no true consequence to him. No, what truly bothered him was the fact that he couldn't be in control of his actions.

For too long his sense of control had been at the hands of others, and it was something that continued here regardless. He trusted Cloud to remain true to his word, but the blonde was the only one he had gathered any level-- of--

Sephiroth's eyes subtly widened at where his thoughts were going before he narrowed them and glanced away. "I care nothing for being 'celebrated'," He coolly said even if Sephiroth knew well that nothing of the sort would ever happen here. He'd been on enough pedestals that he desired to be on no other.

Thoroughly distracted from his thoughts, the ex-General glanced back towards the meister as he regarded Kuroro quietly. There was no doubt to what the other was doing, and Sephiroth wasn't quite certain what to make of it all. "I've yet to figure you out," Sephiroth muttered after a moment, "The efforts behind your actions clearly aren't worth the results you receive in return, and yet you still persist."

"So then power to you is control." Not a difficult conclusion to make -- Kuroro should have figured it out long ago. Sephiroth being a megalomaniac, Crane had said as much, but Kuroro liked testing the waters. Freedom did not equal control. Freedom was the end result of control, and Sephiroth in that sense was like him. The only difference was that control was applied differently, and Kuroro tended to let his control here and there go in favor of certain interesting things.

"The value of what I receive in return for my efforts, and the value of the effort given," Kuroro said, smiling crookedly as he paused (for dramatic effect) and took a shot. "These are things that can only be measured by myself." And the results were well worth it -- would be well worth it in the long run. The Geneiryodan, after all, was built on loyalty and loyalty alone.

Kuroro's words seemed to give the ex-General pause. Losing any sense of his control left him feeling far too off guard and unbalanced. ShinRa had kept him on a short leash, and he'd barely had time to regain his ground after deserting himself before his mind had delved into insanity.

He listened quietly to what the meister said. Sephiroth truly should have expected such an answer, but he'd found himself annoyingly curious. It was almost similar to what he would say to Cloud, and while he should have been cautious, Sephiroth couldn't find it within to muster up such a state.

"It sounds like an answer I would give Cloud," Sephiroth observed thoughtfully before finally reaching forward and taking the shot glass to down it.

"What does that tell you, if I would give you an answer that you would give Cloud?" Oh, so many implications he could take advantage of, if it meant well. Kuroro wasn't actually sure, but it was a gander he was willing to take given how fond Sephiroth seemed to be of his meister.

Refill, laugh. "Let's go back to the beginning of this conversation. Isn't accepting what you are and your heritage a sign of control?"

His cat-like pupils thinned as Kuroro decided to probe further on his observation. "That there are other motives behind your actions," Sephiroth easily said while his glowing gaze remained transfixed on the meister. "And if it truly was an answer of a similar fashion, that you would stop at nothing to get what you want."

He knew well the meaning behind his own words to Cloud, but he wasn't quite convinced whether Kuroro's would be the same. There were some differences since he would never give his meister anything without there being ulterior motives, but Kuroro had showed no such signs.

The laugh broke him out of his thoughts, and within moments, Sephiroth was frowning. It appeared as though the other meister wasn't about to let the topic drop. "One could see it as that," The ex-General murmured cautiously before he glanced to the side, "Yet even with my decision there are those that wish to challenge it."

Crafty, suspicious man, this Sephiroth. Kuroro only laughed again and waved a waitress over to bring them another bottle of their poison. He didn't seem too bothered by the eyes, just as he wasn't ruffled by many things. He only returned his chin to his hand and gave Sephiroth one of his more open smiles. "I told you before when we first met that I want an ally in you. I'm perfectly willing to earn your friendship. That is something that I value, and I am giving an equal worth of effort for it."

But back to the real topic at hand. For a man who fancied himself as confident, Sephiroth had so many insecurities. "Your decision is your own. You're your own man, have your own identify, can think for yourself. You may be stuck in a situation not of your own doing, are a weapon despite your seemingly big dislike for it, and may seem to have no control over a situation, but you can still make decisions outside of these, choose your own partner, fight battles. You have your sanity. I would think that is something of an achievement, considering all you've been through."

He waited patiently for his answer, but whether he wanted to know it or not was another thing. The smile did little to calm his sense of unease. There was always far more hidden behind them than any stony expression, but unlike Kuroro, he simply wasn't capable of giving such gestures in these types of situations.

The fact that Kuroro once again drilled that value home didn't go by unnoticed. Persistence, that was the first word that came to mind when it came to the meister. Friendship, on the other hand, was something that he had given up on a long time ago. Such a thing was something he hadn't even accepted from Cloud despite the blonde's attempts to offer such a thing.

Sephiroth felt his eyes widen at the following words the Kuroro spoke. It wasn't the majority of the content that had caught his interest, but the fact that the other meister seemed to believe that he still had any sense of sanity remaining. The thought caused him to give Kuroro and odd look, as if he wasn't quite sure what to make of the situation, before he forced it away for later thought.

There were some valid points otherwise, but despite all that was said, the ex-General could find no words to return to Kuroro. For the first time he was rendered without an answer or a debate and the thought caused his lips to curve up subtly into a bemused smirk. Picking up the shot, Sephiroth downed it.

"I see that I've rendered you speechless with my brilliance," Kuroro teased, refilling Sephiroth's shot immediately. "I feel that I'm probably wrong in many things, like for example your sanity, judging by the expression on your face. I think you're pretty sane, though. I've seen insanity, and that is not the man sitting in front of me, able to take a bottle worth of vodka without keeling over."

Kuroro had, for example, had to face Hisoka's obsession with him, and while he could argue that Hisoka was sometimes pretty sane, another side of him also wanted to point out the the damn clown usually got erections just looking at Kuroro. No, Sephiroth was pretty sane considering all he knew of the man.

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[Close] Been away for far too long.

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