soul_logs | Mission log, closed

Entry tags:

Mission log, closed

Characters: Alucard and Raidou Kuzunoha

Location: Scandanavia

Rating: PG for ass whupping

Time: May 1

Description: Alucard and Raidou decide to take on a mission, this time with risk of madness. Will both partners be able to keep it together?

Finding their quarry was proving difficult. First they arrived in a village and had to talk to several people to get their stories. As to where the kishin eggs might be located, people pointed to the bare landscape outside of town and told them to keep walking.

Two hours of scouting the bare plains proved useless. It was also difficult to keep track of where they'd been as all flowers looked similar along with trees, rocks and mounds.

"I hope we are not wandering in circles," Alucard said.

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Alucard transformed back. Fortunately the blood on his blade form didn't transfer with him. The dhampir made quick work of the souls, swallowing them quickly.

He went back to Raidou, who was sitting on the grass. God, this had been a bad reaction, only in another direction. His partner and friend looked lost. Raidou wouldn't be moving from this spot soon. The best Alucard could do was stand guard over him and wait.

Raidou did not speak. He was breathing heavily, just trying to calm down and clear his head. This was like before, when the Witches had reversed his personality -- or brought out some aspect of him he hadn't wanted to know about. The thought made him balk. Was this the same thing? Had there been an ally nearby, would he have ceased to care about their safety? He probably would have. There hadn't been anything in his mind except the rush of ecstasy, of being free and powerful and unbeatable.

His thoughts were too jumbled to make sense of.

"Alucard-san, I..." He stopped. "No... Nevermind."

"No."

At least his Meister was showing signs of lucidity. He knelt down in the grass. "Tell me what you saw." Having Raidou not tell him anything at all would never get his friend to talk about what was plaguing him.

Raidou took a deep breath, trying to sort out his head.

"It was... I saw my predecessors again, but... they did nothing. They could do nothing to me -- I knew I could destroy them if I wanted to. It made me feel..."

What did it make him feel? Happy? No -- he couldn't possibly feel happy about the idea of killing members of his own clan. They may have been strict to him, but they were his family. Gouto was one of them, his mentor and companion... Why would he want to hurt them?

"I don't know."

"Did it make you feel powerful?"

Alucard's tone held no condemnation. He simply wanted to understand his friend.

"...Yes."

His hand gripped the grass.

"I... I would not betray them just to feel powerful. Never." Raidou raised his gaze, staring at Alucard almost pleadingly. "That was not me... was it?"

He almost wished he hadn't asked that. He couldn't ask Alucard to tell him how his own mind worked, could he?

Alucard sighed through his nose. He moved so he was sitting, not kneeling on the grass. "I do not think I can exactly answer your question, but I can tell you this. When you have power, be it mental or physical over someone, there is a very real temptation to use it harshly. Even if the thought is you could do something better than the people who have power over you. I have felt such impulses before. It is the nature of man to be tempted and what you saw was a possibility of that temptation."

Raidou exhaled, his hands slowly relaxing. "I suppose you are right. Being a Devil Summoner does not make me impervious to temptation."

The more power he gained, the more his boldness would grow... but so would his pride. He would have to keep himself in check.

But wasn't that what he had decided after Grand Canyon too, after the Witches had twisted his morals? It hadn't seemed to help anyone then -- if anything, denying that part of himself had made him even more susceptible to the Madness wavelength. So he had resolved to give himself just a little more freedom... and now his fear had been replaced by rage. What was he supposed to do?

'Abandon the role of "Raidou". Turn away from this spectacle. That will be your salvation...'

He scowled and stood up abruptly. Whatever else he did, he wasn't going to obey the voice behind the Shinado mask.

"Let's go home," he said curtly.

"Very well."

It was quite the quiet trip all the long way home. Alucard did not break the silence until they were safely in their apartment, the door closed and their respective cloaks hung up. The dhampir, standing behind Raidou, placed a hand on his partner's shoulder.

"You can always talk to me, my friend."

Raidou had walked on in sullen silence and remained stiff through their report to Shibusen. He had thought to escape to his room, or go out to the training grounds to blow off some steam -- anything to avoid talking about what had happened.

And yet... The warm hand on his shoulder eased his temper, and he found himself turning and looking up at his partner, searching for... he wasn't sure what. Just watching Alucard's face felt good enough to warrant a prolonged stare.

"I know... Thank you. I just need some time to myself right now. Finding the answers I need... is my burden alone."

"Perhaps I cannot offer you answers, but this is not your burden alone. At the very least, I can listen to you."

It was the most natural thing in the world to enfold Raidou in his arms and rest his chin on top of Raidou's hat. "You are...one of the greatest friends I have ever had and I have lived a long time. I want to help you as much as I am able."

"Ah--" Raidou lost his voice for a moment, a flush creeping up his face. Alucard felt warm, and the heat seemed to spread through him limbs, leaving his skin tingling. Alarmed by the strange reaction, he stood very still, fumbling for words.

"I-I know. I just, er..." he cleared his throat. "There are some things I need to find out on my own. I did not mean I don't want you at my side while I do so--"

He hadn't meant to put it quite like that. The detective trailed off, bewildered and embarrassed.

Oh, so Raidou wasn't pushing him away. Just that as he said, Raidou needed to find a personal answer to his dilemma. Alucard's heart thumped a bit harder. He let Raidou go and placed his hands on Raidou's shoulders.

He couldn't come up with anything to say for a while, except to stare into Raidou's eyes. Belatedly, the dhampir wondered at his behavior and struggled for something mundane to break this silence.

"What say that we order food instead of bothering to cook?"

Why is he looking at me like that? Raidou stared back into Alucard's eyes, then felt his face inexplicably grow hotter and averted his gaze. He had no idea what to say next, and was relieved when the dhampir changed the subject.

"That... That is fine."

This seems like a nice blushy place to end the mission. XD

Sure!

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OOC

Re: OOC