soul_logs | OPEN

Characters: Kadaj and whoever else!

Location: Death City Outskirts

Rating: PG

Time: Afternoon of March 14th

Description: Kadaj reflects on what he must do to get in Shibusen’s good graces again.

Several long and begrudging days had passed since he had been released from jail. Kadaj was doing his best to keep a low profile. Hiding underneath the Shibusen’s watchful gaze was tricky at best, but luckily the remnant’s innate skill and know-how had kept him alive so far. It was his devotion, determination, and hope to one day be reunited with Mother that kept him going—it kept him fighting.

The outskirts of Death City were miserably hot. The heat bore heavily down on him. Light skin and silver hair offered little protection, and the thick leather suit he wore clung to his body. He favored it to the inner city which was polluted with humans and their trash.

Kadaj bent down and scooped up a handful of hot sand. “Don’t worry, Mother.” He spoke aloud, as if she could hear him. “I won’t let them keep you away from me forever.” It occurred to Kadaj that his failed strategic attempts all had something in common. Only now, did he realize that he'd need to use different tactics to regain his rightful place by Mother’s side.

“I’ll ruin this planet first if I have to.” He crushed the sand within his fist. “Whatever it takes!” The sand leaked through his fingers until nothing remained.

He didn’t like this new idea. It wasn’t his style. But getting his way, was, and if it meant trying something he didn’t like to get results, then so be it!

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"But you wasted mine!" Lee crossed his arm, not planning on giving up so easily. "You are also acting quite erratic! It is natural to think that the heat is not doing well for you, especially dressed in such heavy black garments!"

Whether they were really all that heavy in Kadaj's mind or not, compared to Lee's spandex they would have been like an oven! Perhaps if he waited it out, the sun would become too much and he could drag the man back into the inner city for treatment...

"You are not a very happy person, are you?"

“No.” Strict. Firm. To the point. Kadaj knew what true happiness was. His brief experience of it had left a mark on him, an emotional longing to feel it again. He flexed his fingers before curling them into tight fists. All that built up frustration, anger, and disappointment was testing his self-control. It will be worth it, he reminded himself. Well worth it.

“Let me guess,” his tone was drenched with spit and sarcasm. “You’re happy to be here. To be fighting a war that isn’t yours to fight?” Kadaj turned to face Lee with a scowling frown. “You have friends and families here too, don’t you? And you’re just perfectly fine with being lied to--with being put on the front lines for such a worthless cause!” Stay calm, Kadaj.

He clenched his mouth shut so tightly that his jaw muscles twitched. The remnant broke eye contact and turned his back to Lee again. It was obvious, wasn’t it? “Of course I’m not.”

"Um... yes. You did. And you are." Lee was about done with this argument. He wasn't going to accept a lie. But that would be his last words on it. Any more denial would simply be ignored.

Lee had not expected the sudden outburst that his question would cause. If he had been weaker he might have started backing away, but Lee held his ground like a good soldier. His face remained fairly blank as the man finished his rant, finally coming to the conclusion it had been building toward.

"I understand." Lee said after a length of silence had passed. "BREW has brought many here who had obligations back home, things to do, and also some who are not fighters at all. It has not been fair in how it chooses to hold us here, or when it chooses to send others back."

Lee shook his head. "But what use is it to squander your time and energy. If a wish to end this war is what brought us here, then doing what we can to end the war will lead us home." Whether Lee hated the circumstances or relished them was a moot point. It was the result of his hard work that mattered.

“It’s people like you that the Shibusen like.” Yes, exactly like Lee. A perfect little solider. Well, being a perfect little solider was not something the remnant carelessly took part in. Not unless it was directly beneficial for Mother, anyway. “How do you know they aren’t lying?” Kadaj stood tall, arching a silver brow at Lee.

“Do you believe everything they tell you?” It figured. Far too many of these guests were all too eager to please the hand that fed them. “This war has been going on for 800 years!” He seethed. “What makes you think we’re going to make a difference? What makes you think they’ll send us back? They won’t!” Kadaj made a large sweeping gesture with his arm. He shook and head and scoffed. “Don’t be so naïve. We’re never being sent back.”

Lee listened patiently again to the remnant's outbursts. While he wasn't going to underestimate the man, all he was doing was shooting verbal complaints. There was a possibility that if he became violent Lee would need help taking him down, but as it was he didn't think that would be the best method when perhaps all Kadaj needed to do was vent his frustrations.

"If you believe trust in someone else is naive, then you must live in a very drear world." Lee shook his head, his bandaged arms moving to cross his chest. "Even in a land full of shinobi, I have come to know that trust is a precious thing that cannot be fully discarded."

"If that makes me naive, then I suppose I am. But they have little reason to lie to us. There are many of us here now. If they were to lie and they refused to send us home then we could always revolt." He's completely serious as he mentioned the matter of revolution, unafraid of voicing his honest opinion. "There are enough of us by now, and we are a formidable force."

Violence was something Kadaj was well acquainted with. In fact, one could say that they were the best friends. He was much stronger and agile than the average human back home. Violence was the preferred method of getting answers. It didn’t work that way here. Oh no, all the rules in Death City were different and Kadaj was all too aware of that fact. For now, Lee was safe from any physical attacks.

“My world,” Kadaj explained and then quickly corrected, “Mother’s world, was stolen from us. It became infested with useless creatures that only sought its own destruction.” Kadaj’s tone was particularly cold and lacked the usual drive his voice carried. He was drained—emotionally. Endless failures had tendency to do that people.

“Even the planet tried to rid of its own inhabitants!” The teen half smirked and casually added, “I helped.” But it had not been enough. “We should revolt now,” Kadaj said decisively, “before it is too late.”

That did sound like a devastating problem. Lee frowned, concern wilting his usually chipper expression. "I am sorry to hear about your world, but I do not believe causing a disturbance in this world will lead you back where you wish to go.

You... do wish to return home, correct?"

What a ridiculous question! "Yes," Kadaj said, exacerbated. Hadn't this water lover been listening to him at all? "I won't just stand idly by while Mother waits!" Why was he explaining this to a stranger again? In the past it has only gotten him into severe trouble. The kind of trouble he didn't go looking for and the kind he didn't want to experience again.

As Kadaj fought with his inner thoughts an innocent insect flew past. It circled once or twice, as if confused or lost, before the remnant snapped out and captured it within a gloved fist. Ah, a new victim.

"We're just the Shibusen's prisoners," he said, tightening his grip on the bug. No matter how insignificant it was, it still pleased Kadaj to make it suffer. A thin smile lifted one corner of his mouth as he slowly opened his hand. "Ever consider that this war is just another way for them to keep us busy from finding the truth?"

The little bug, which turned out to be a small butterfly, tried to escape. It struggled and squirmed but found its freedom pinned by one of Kadaj's fingers.

He was just trying to get some clarification. It was difficult when Kadaj made it sound like his world had been made so worthless, though Lee wondered if maybe that was just because the other man was pessimistic. Perhaps he was in need of counseling.

Lee felt a wave of disgust flow through him as Kadaj held the butterfly in his unrelenting grip. He felt less of an affinity towards bugs than he felt for animals, but it did not deserve the rough treatment.

"I do not see why they would want to keep up busy, or what truth they are hiding," he said evenly. "Even if it was their machine that brought us here, Shibusen does not extort our services. We can even eat and live for free in their housing, even if we are not serving in the war. And what truth would they be hiding? So far, they have been up-front about the Madness and the Witches, and neither of those forces has done anything to disprove their malevolence." His logic did have to ride on some faith since he couldn't be sure Shibusen didn't hide some things from them, but he believed his points were solid.

"You should let it go." He said, his gaze once again moving to the butterfly. "Or squash it now. Either. But it is not what brought you here, nor is it what has caused your world suffering back home. If you harm it, you will gain nothing from it."

Not that Lee expected Kadaj to care, but he said his piece. It was up to the remnant to decide if he was going to continue to be cruel.

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