soul_logs | Now. This is it.

Entry tags:

auron,
yuna

Now. This is it.

Characters: Auron and Yuna
Location: Yuna and Vergil's apartment
Rating: G
Time: Sunday, after 6 p.m.
Description: Auron's trying to figure out what's going on in his own head and needs to talk to Yuna.

Roy had given him the next three days off. With another fight looming, Auron knew he had figure out what the hell was going on his head. How could he be so unprofessional and put someone else in danger?

He'd been able to determine that his own changing thoughts were the blame in his failed and painful resonation attempt with Sora's friend Riku. He also knew that a large part of his need for a Weapon was just to fight with Yuna and Rikku, but that might the very problem messing with his head.

Auron wasn't looking forward to figuring out the truth. But he had to. He couldn't be a hazard on the battlefield.

So that's why he was waiting by Yuna and Vergil's apartment. He thought that if he talked to Yuna, it would be a start.

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"I am?"

Yuna watched him as he spoke, paying close attention. This was obviously important to him, and so it was important to her as well.

"Hm, maybe not," she said, looking thoughtful. "After all, we were strongest when we were trying to protect Spira, and each other. It's the same with Death City, for me."

"I don't know why it's harder for me to think that way."

He shouldn't care so much about trying to "catch up." Or feeling like he had to. He raked a hand through his short greying hair in frustration. "I should just concentrate on helping out because I do have a lot of combat experience that's helpful. But I seem to keep getting stuck in the same spot. It just feels like I'm being..."

Auron stopped in the middle of his sentence. Although his high collar and shades normally hid his expression, the way he was leaning forward negated both of them. He looked resigned and not a little sad.

Her head tilted to the side as her eyes fell upon him, a worried expression on her face. It was unlike Auron to seem so indecisive; usually he had been the one with all the answers and direction.

"You have far more combat experience than I do, Sir Auron," she said gently. "The only reason I can fight is because of Yuuri's guidance." She thought for a moment before she continued. "It's not so much about missions and fighting, but the city as a whole."

"Like you're being...?" she prompted, hoping he'd continue.

The words were almost hard to make out, lost in the natural rumble of his voice, dropped very low. "Like I'm being left behind."

Auron sat up and drank some water in hard, quick swallow. "I already know what that's like and I guess that I've been trying to avoid it again." Fayth, it all came back to one day, one fight and one moment. Everything in his life since then always went back to that. It probably always would, even without him realizing it.

"Sir Auron..."

She let her voice trail off as she looked at him with concern in her eyes. It was unusual for him to be so down; Auron had always been the rock in their group, guiding them. It seemed even the strongest of people needed encouragement at times.

"That won't happen, again," she said, shaking her head. "I'm not going anywhere."

Yuna would be correct. It was so hard for Auron to be the rock when he had so much time to think for a change.

The assurance did make Auron smile a little. "Thanks. I appreciate it. I guess...I guess I should treasure more the fact we still have time together instead of worrying about things that aren't important."

He took a swallow of his water, looking more the thoughtful guardian as he always was. "Even Rikku, as much as she gets under my skin. I'm glad she's here too."

Yuna gave him a smile and a nod; that was sort of her entire outlook on life. Every moment she was alive now was time that she didn't think she would have. She wanted to enjoy it as much as she could, live her life to the fullest and never do anything halfway.

The summoner laughed, shrugging her shoulders a bit. "Rikku is Rikku. She means well, though I can see why you two don't get along. She cares about you too, though."

They'd gone through a lot together, after all. Things like that left a mark that never went away.

Auron grumbled, albeit goodnaturedly. "I suppose...I suppose I should tell her that. That I'm glad she's here."

He finished his water and set his glass aside. An odd thought occurred to him. "So what do you do when you get back from patrol? Just be...domestic around here?"

"You should. Everyone likes to hear things like that." That they're wanted, appreciated. Rikku would enjoy it.

"Yes, for the most part. I'm busy a lot with training and patrols, so I usually want to relax a bit. Though, I still swim pretty often. Wakka would be upset if I stopped practicing."

Among others. She'd be disappointed in herself, too.

Auron gave a little sound of affirmation but nothing more on that subject. He'd probably tell her. Eventually.

"That's one skill I never got the hang of. Heavy swords and large bodies of water don't mix well."

It was nice just having a conversation with her, but he couldn't do it forever. Not when he had a problem to face. With a sigh, he stood up. "I think I know what I have to do now."

Yuna's eyes rose as Auron rose to his feet, a smile on her face.

"And what's that?" she asked curiously, standing as well to show him out.

He picked up his katana in the corner of the room and slid it into his back sheath.

"I have to face my fears. No one else can help me with that part."

Auron hesitated in leaving the apartment. He turned around to give Yuna a one-armed embrace around her shoulders. "But...thanks for helping me see what I have to do," he said.

"Mm." Yuna nodded in understanding. Some things just had to be done by yourself.

"You're welcome." She wasn't quite sure how she'd managed to help, but if she had, then she was happy. The smile her expression held was proof of that as his arm slipped around her shoulders and she looked up at him.

"Take care of yourself, okay? I'll see you soon."

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Now. This is it.

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